It's time to leave when...

It's time to leave when you can't keep it all together anymore.

I did it again. I lost it, and this time, it was with one of the staff I work with.

Here goes.

Last August, I started to partake in the English club activities of one of my elementary schools. I wasn't too enchanted about the extra work but I wasn't really given a chance to refuse or accept. The Japanese lady who usually takes care of the club (let's call her Mrs K) is a pushy woman in her late forties. She's the type of Japanese person who's a total slave to the system and loves it. She always tries to get everyone in her boat. In other words, she's a great source of annoyance. I know she has the kids interests at heart but she's still very annoying. She sometimes comes to my English classes and totally confuses the children with her zealous English no one understands.

Anyway, I had to work with her for about 9 sessions of the English club. When we made the curriculum, I suggested the kids do a short English play; she accepted the idea. So each week the kids practiced. To be honest, they were really bad and it would never have crossed my mind to have them actually show the play. Mrs K., however was adamant: the plays had to be presented to the rest of the school. I said yes, ok, whatever. I didn't think I would have to get involved in this. I was wrong. Mrs K decided that the kids would show the play during lunchtime and that I had to be there. Now I don't care how much Japanese people are devoted to their work but MY lunchtime is MINE. I don't work on my time off. Unfortunately, Mrs K. did not even think of asking me if I was ok with the idea and just decided everything without telling me. For the sake of the kids, I just couldn't say no. I was NOT a happy trooper.

So on Wednesday I went to school during my lunchtime and helped the kids with their play. They sucked as always but I was still excited to see them on the stage. Once they were done, came the time to play games. The kids, Mrs K and I had discussed the games we were planning on doing and I was just starting to play one of them with my students when Mrs K. came and interrupted me.

You have to play Red light, Green light first!

True, that game was the first on the brainstorming list but did the order really matter? I mean, the kids were screaming and laughing. Anyone who would have walked in at that moment would have thought these kids were having the time of their life. I gently shooed her away.

It's ok, don't worry. Leave it to me.

I went back to the game. After a moment she interrupted me. Again.

This will not do. We won't be able to play Green light, Red light after this game. It won't work.

Now the game we were playing was simple; I would call a number and the kids had to group up with their friends until the number of people holding hands matched the one I had called. How would that game make playing Red light, Green light impossible? I started to be really annoyed and raised my voice.

Listen, it doesn't matter ok? We can play it after. Leave it to me. The kids are having fun.

I tried to continue the game but she wouldn't let me. She kept on saying that the order was important. She raised her voice, I raised mine. Eventually I just lost it. I had been enduring her for two years and a half without a word but that was the last straw.

You know what? If you're not happy, just do it yourself. I'm fed up!

I left the gymnasium without a glance. She tried to hold me back but I just wouldn't listen. I passed the Principal, apologized to him and went straight to the teachers' room. I was furious. You ask me to do extra work, on my lunchtime without asking me if I agree and then you complain because it's not what you wanted? Screw you! My mind was filled with such thoughts and worse ones.

I ended up going to class without seeing her again. I presume she continued the activities alone but I'm not sure. As I was cooling down I started to feel bad for the kids. This is not something I had wanted them to see. Then, when I finally went back to the teacher's room, Mrs K. spoke to be as if nothing had happened but by the sound of her voice, I had the feeling I had made her cry. I kinda felt sorry but it was too late.

I guess I could have given in and go along with he plans but it just made no sense to interrupt the game the students were enjoying. I just can't understand why the order was so important. In my opinion, what is important is the kids. As a teacher I always try to find games my students will enjoy. If they're having fun, they're probably learning something. I often change my lessons plans half through lessons because what I'm doing just doesn't work. I improvise a lot. Unfortunately, this is something most Japanese people seem unable to do. If there's a plan, they stick to it, no matter what.

When I told M. kanmuri about the whole thing he told me that it is likely that Mrs K. had had to present a written proposition for the activity and have it approved by the Principal. That means that the plan needed to be followed because any changes would have needed the Principal's approval. Knowing the Japanese society, it makes a lot of sense. Still, I think it's ridiculous and I refuse to be bound by silly lesson plans...

And that's why it's time I leave this country!!